Test of Conviction The New Moon in Fixed Air, AQUARIUS

by Andrew Smith

Test of Conviction

The New Moon in Fixed Air, octile to the Venus/ Chiron – Saturn square

On the 28th January at 00:06 GMT

“Sacred is the prayer that asks for nothing while seeking to give thanks for every breath we take”
– Prince Rogers Nelson

 Image – Ariele Alasko

Immersed in her studio, working stoically on this wooden box, Little Spirit notices how this process mirrors what is taking place in her heart as she feels the urge to redefine the boundaries of her heart; strengthen them by stripping them down, reviewing the quality of what lies beneath the surface, replacing what needs to be replaced, strengthening what is to remain and then varnishing the whole. Issue after issue, many of which are echoes of who it is that she has been, arise as she feels who it is that she has been – those patterns and scripts that defined her relationship to her creative essence; the way in which she has consented to being treated (or more accurately, the level to which she permitted her heart to conduct itself within all forms of relationship); the underlying dynamics that exists between her and those in her world; the way in which she is valued, personally, intimately and financially, are but a few of the issues that draws in her awareness for healing, releasing and forgiveness.

Plaining away, layer upon layer revealing the truth of her heart – the neglect of self-love; the unintentional impoverishment of your emotional body; the compromises; the longing; the inability to act because it might hurt someone else… and she thought that all she has envisioned was to carve a box from wood!!

Yet as she seeks to finish the box, she can feel a ‘freshness’ to the ‘air’ around her; an excitement that something has broken through; and a calming down of such intense processing and releasing. The promise to commit and attract those into her life who are affirming, supportive, caring and kind has been infused into this wooden totem, a totem that she will carry around her, reminding her that she has taken the time to care for herself as she has crafted something beautiful to house her heart.

As she prepares to share this totem, it will remind her of the promises that she has made to herself to care for her heart.

*****

It is so easy to become incensed by injustice, by vindictiveness, by petty small mindedness and by ignorance. It is so easy to waste your energy on fantasies of getting even, to conjure up infinite fantastical scenarios in your mind’s eye or to envision the egoic satisfaction of the perfect repartee, as you break the ‘other’ in the righteous act of doing onto them that has been done onto you. It is all too easy to fight back at the same level to which you have been ‘taunted’. And it is all too easy to allow negativity repetitively spin on a never ending loop, addictively releasing that sweet nectar dopamine around your system, further fuelling rapture envisioned prophesies.

But what is happening?

You are being enslaved to the leaden chains that can only lead to a downwards path, pushing you further away from your heart, enabling you to miss the deeper meaning within the ‘lesson’, distracting and exhausting you, letting someone else’s perspective infiltrate and puppeteer your soul and blind you to the other possible paths available to you. You are giving permission to an external voice to soothe your soul with stale air, slowing asphyxiating you with the carbon monoxide of unkindness. You are binding yourself to the ever perpetuating wheel of karma, magnetising yourself to this plane of consciousness to ever repeat, time after time, the same scenarios until one day you realise that you are merely playing out Einstein’s definition of stupidity.

Is that what you want?

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Written at 23:55 GMT, 19th November 2016.

Location:  Dublin, Rep. Ireland

Email:  dastroc @ gmail.com
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